We open with Teddy Long. The GM is already in the ring, doing his funky dance when he is introduced by Lillian Garcia. Long announces the field for Smackdown's Elimination Chamber World title match: Daniel Bryan defends vs. Big Show, Mark Henry, Wade Barrett, Cody Rhodes, & Randy Orton. That means that, barring a Rhodes title defense in the next couple of weeks, the Intercontinental title will remain ignored.
Henry comes out, demanding to be taken out of the match. He wants Bryan tonight. No sale. Long, however, is annoyed with his former charge's antics, and after Henry tugs on the GM's necktie, Long grants one wish. Henry's out of the chamber match, because he's been suspended indefinitely (to cover his knee injury, sustained a week ago). Sheamus is out next, and promptly boots Henry out with a Brogue Kick. Cody Rhodes is out after that, and brags about lasting 45 minutes in the Royal Rumble, tallying 6 eliminations. Long sets up our first match......
1. Non-title: Cody Rhodes vs. Sheamus.
Why they won't have Rhodes defend the IC title is a mystery. He's not elevating the belt by taking non-title bouts week after week. Sheamus, with a title match in his pocket for Wrestlemania, has no such worries. Rhodes hit the Beautiful Disaster on the floor, then had to carry Sheamus into the ring. Gets a 2. Later, he tries the Disaster again, but this time, Sheamus is ready and ducks. Rhodes dodges the Brogue Kick, but not the Emerald Frosien, which was last used by David Otunga just a few weeks ago. When Finlay used it as his finisher, it was known as---wait for it---the Celtic Cross. Winner: Sheamus.
Rhodes lingers around the ring after, and that proves significant in our next bout......
2. Justin Gabriel vs. Hunico (w/Camacho).
Hunico and Gabriel had a recent series which saw Hunico win 2 of 3, just as he recently did with Ted DiBiase before DiBiase went on the shelf with a wrist injury. This time, the match never starts, as Rhodes ambushes Gabriel for no reason. Hunico & Camacho join in before Great Khali, who returned at the Rumble, made the save. I guess now we have a challenger for the IC title......
3. Non-title: Epico & Primo Colon (w/Rosa Mendes) vs. Santino Marella & Hacksaw Jim Duggan.
The Hall of Famer returned at the Rumble, but is here as a 1-shot otherwise. Marella is in a position where he's trying to find a decent partner to challenge the tag champs. Last week, it was Yoshi Tatsu. Rosa, however, is the x factor. She blows a kiss to Santino, trying to distract him. He waves it off, and prepares the Cobra for Primo, who floats over and hits the backstabber instead. Winners: Epico & Primo Colon.
4. Beth Phoenix & Natalya Niedhart vs. Aksana & Tamina.
Last week, Aksana wrestled and needed one move to beat Natalya, a mere schoolgirl rollup. This time, she gets the best of Natalya with some quick moves, but after Tamina is knocked off the apron by Natalya, Beth tags herself in and promptly squashes Aksana with the Glam Slam. Winners: Beth Phoenix & Natalya Niedhart.
However, there is trouble with Pin Up Strong, and that may be because of Natalya's sudden problem with flatulence. Nat is left all alone, so she tries to add to Aksana's pain, but Tamina makes the save and squashes Natalya again. Ya think maybe they should've given Tamina a chance to see what she could do vs. Beth?
Michael Cole attempted to interview Daniel Bryan, but the champ still resents Cole's disrespect, so he sends Cole back to the desk and cuts a self-serving heel promo promoting his vegan lifestyle. Not exactly like CM Punk promoting Straight Edge, but you get the idea. Bryan wants out of the Chamber, too. Gee, what a shock. Big Show is out and questions Bryan declaring himself a role model. Bryan slaps him. Bad idea. Show throttles him and hits the chokeslam, just as AJ Lee returns. He sets up for the Weapon of Mass Destruction, but Lee stops him, and Bryan escapes. Show has a concerned look on his face, especially seeing Lee with a neck brace, overselling her injuries from last month.......
A video feature on John Cena aired to promote Wrestlemania.
Randy Orton interview. Tonight's rematch with Wade Barrett is No-DQ, and, well, you know Orton won't have a problem with that.....
5. Randy Orton vs. Wade Barrett.
Early on, Orton pulled out a table, but an attempted superplex backfires, and Barrett shoved him through the wood. The two traded chair shots. Orton then hit a one arm RKO, then added a second on the chair to end it. Winner: Randy Orton.
Bryan & AJ are in Teddy Long's office. Long announces Bryan vs. Orton for next week, so Bryan comes out at the end of the show and celebrates. Like, the champ has a death wish.......
