We open with a group of "reporters" gathered outside Johnny Nitro's locker room, hoping to get comments from the champion, who has scheduled a press conference for later. A "press agent" emerges and claims that Nitro will appear on ECW for the last time tonight. You may need a case of Morton's Salt to buy into this.

Match 1: CM Punk vs. Elijah Burke What? Again? Last night, it was advertised that Marcus Cor Van would face Punk. I've got a suspicion about this late switch, but I'll save my comments until I learn further. Anyway, it never gets old between these two, and this was a dandy. Burke controlled much of the action and worked on the lower back of Punk. Looked as though Burke might acually get a win here, but it was not to be. Swing and a miss, and Punk hits him with Go to Sleep, seemingly out of nowhere, to score yet another win. Winner: CM Punk.

Match 2: Big Daddy V (w/Matt Striker) vs. Ted Storm Pre-match, Striker came out and played the tape of BDV decimating Boogeyman last week, then introduced BDV as his "redemption". Total squash, as Storm got no offense in at all. BDV won with his version of the Black Hole Slam. Winner: Big Daddy V.

Mike Mizanin is in the ring, and cuts a promo, saying that he thinks he might be a chick magnet. The crowd is booing a little. Mike introduces Extreme Expose. Layla brings a chair into the ring and Miz sits down to get a good look at the girls grooving to the beat of Ciara. I keep waiting for something to happen, but as of now it appears the slate's been wiped clean between Miz & Layla.

Joey & Tazz talk about Johnny Nitro's press conference and the claim that the champion is making his last appearance tonight. Something's up, and I don't like the smell of it. Clips are shown of the Nitro-Tommy Dreamer extreme rules match from last week. Back live, and Dreamer is on his way to the ring for the next match......

Match 3: Tommy Dreamer vs. Kevin Thorn Indeed, 'tis the season for reruns, as these two are matched yet again. Dreamer, to his credit, tries something different, and hits what looks like a frogsplash on Thorn for 2. Sets up for a piledriver, but Thorn powers out. Thorn tries the Splash Mountain crucifix bomb, but Dreamer escapes. Dreamer attempts a DDT, but Thorn counters and eventually shoves Dreamer shoulder-first into the post. Amazingly, that's enough for Thorn to garner yet another win over Dreamer, but the vampire is not satisfied, as he hits the Original Sin, his pet finisher, after the match. Something tells me that the finish came a little too soon. Winner: Kevin Thorn.

Press agent Paul McBride is in the ring, and reiterates that Johnny Nitro will not be in ECW again. That's because the champion has changed his name. He comes out to new music, and cooler clothes. He claims his "real" name is John Morrison. Well, he does have his hair styled similarly to the late Jim Morrison. Thanks, John, for providing the press with some fresh material for down the line. Morrison questions why CM Punk is so named, and of course the challenger comes out to respond. Morrison claims he won't attack, but in feigning giving Punk the mic, he does just that and lays out Punk with the corkscrew neckbreaker. Punk is left in a heap to end the show.