We open with GM Armando Estrada, surrounded by trash cans, shopping carts and assorted other "plunder". Estrada is doing the ring introductions for tonight's opening match......

Match 1: Tommy Dreamer vs. Big Daddy V (w/Matt Striker)(hardcore rules) Return match from last week, but this time, you'd think Dreamer would have at least a fighting chance against a man twice his size with all the weapons in the ring. Nope. BDV took the kendo stick away and snapped it in 2. He set up a shopping cart in the corner and rammed Dreamer into it. Big Daddy would meet the cart himself, missing a corner splash. Dreamer went for a table, but was distracted by Striker, which took away what chance Dreamer had to win the match. Big Daddy took over and put Dreamer through the wood with the Samoan Drop to end it. Winner: Big Daddy V.

Vince McMahon & Jonathan Coachman are in the house, as the investigation into the identity of Vince's bastard son continues.

We're shown the same videos for CM Punk and John Morrison during the show. Nothing new.

Balls Mahoney is brought in for an interview, in a do-over, since this was edited off Saturday Night's Main Event. Vince dismisses him as a prospective son, going so far as to discount his own genitals. Oy!

Match 2: Elijah Burke vs. Balls Mahoney One ECW Original has already gone down, will it be 2 in a row? Joey, meanwhile, is contemplating the improbability of ECW's own version of Capt. Caveman (Mahoney) being sired by McMahon. They bring up Mahoney's amateur background and that he was thrown off his high school wrestling team. Burke should tag up with Morrison, as those two both have some gymnastics in their backgrounds, Burke with that handstand into an elbow in the corner, which is always effective, but never gets him a fall. Burke, however, missed a corner charge, and Mahoney gets to "tha pay winda", as Dusty Rhodes would say, with a schoolboy rollup. Winner: Balls Mahoney.

Post-match, Mahoney encounters Mike Mizanin & Extreme Expose. Miz mockingly congratulates Mahoney and the prospect of "Balls McMahon". Kelly tries to say something, but Miz shuts her up, trying to retain control over her. Let's put an end to that ASAP, shall we? Kelly, however, winks at Balls as she reluctantly leaves.

Back to the executive suite. Estrada's work is done for the night, unfortunately, as we have to suffer with Mr. Burns & Smithers (McMahon & Coach) yet again. This time, CM Punk is brought in, and McMahon freely acknowledges there's no way the Straight Edge superstar would be his kid because of his lifestyle, which would be clean compared to McMahon's worked philandering, and Punk calls him out on it. Good stuff.

Kevin Thorn is interviewed after losing via DQ last week to Stevie Richards. Richards interrupts, copying Thorn's play from 2 weeks ago, and that leads to another pull-apart.

Match 3: Boogeyman & CM Punk vs. John Morrison & Mike Mizanin (w/Extreme Expose) Changing tag partners seems to agree with the ECW champion in this case, but they did nothing to tease a possible angle where Morrison could take the girls away from Miz. Let's face it. Morrison's retro 60's rock star/sex symbol gimmick is tailor made for something like that, and he fits the chick magnet label better than Mizizzle anyway. I'm digressing. When we go to break, Boogey has chased away the girls by spitting worms all over the joint. Back from break, however, Morrison & Punk are in, with the champ in control. Joey references breakdancing when describing Morrison's spinning legdrop, but having previously acknowledged the champion's gymnastics background, you'd think either Joey or Tazz would've figured out that "breakdancing" legdrop has its roots in gold medalist Kurt Thomas' repertoire (The Thomas Flare). Please, do some research! Boogey was never tagged back into the match, though Punk tried to get him a hot tag. Miz gets rid of Boogey by knocking him off the apron, but pays for it as Punk totally destroys Miz. He hits the Go To Sleep, but Miz tagged Morrison before that, and after an enziguri, the champ hit the corkscrew neckbreaker to end it, getting a win back from Saturday. Winners: John Morrison & Mike Mizanin.