 Match 1: Deuce 'N' Domino vs. Batista Our show began with a simulated match between Batista & Umaga from the Smackdown vs. Raw '08 video game, giving viewers a slightly skewed idea of how the "Battle for Brand Supremacy" might turn out 9 days hence at Wrestlemania 24. Feel sorry if you like for Deuce & Domino, who've been on a horrid losing streak of late while their valet Cherry is involved in the diva competition. In fact, Cherry isn't with her charges for a change. Doesn't change their luck, though. Protracted squash. Unlike Brian Kendrick & Paul London vs. Umaga on Monday, however, D & D do get some offense in, however slight, but, to use Batista's nickname here, it's like an animal playing with his food. A cheap shot by Deuce is answered with a forearm. Domino can't capitalize. Deuce tries going up top, but Batista intercepts and beels him to the mat. Domino eats a spear. Deuce is tossed. Domino is finished after a spinebuster and the Batista Bomb. Goodbye! Winner: Batista.As for Cherry, she's backstage getting ready when Maryse, who was eliminated last week, comes in talking trash, complaining that the competition is rigged. In defense of Maryse, however, the fans barely know her except for the video vignettes that have aired infrequently over the last year and change.
It's week 3 of the diva competition, and a 3rd different host. Vicki Guerrero must be on vacation, because Teddy Long is hosting and getting his shine on. Tonight, it's arm wrestling. 1st heat: Victoria defeated Eve Torres. Vic was talking trash the entire time, and gave the rookie a cheap shot before pinning her arm. 2nd heat: Michelle McCool def. Cherry. A handshake signifies a face turn is in the cards for sure for Cherry. Vic tries shouting encouragement, as she's hoping for an easier time with Ms. Bobby Sox, but it's not to be. 3rd heat: Michelle def. Victoria. More trash from Vic, but Michelle remains cool & quiet. After it's over Vic's whining. Now, it's time for the results of last week's fan vote, and there's nore reason for Vic to complain, as she's been eliminated, leaving the door standing wide open for Michelle to run the table.
Match 2: Big Show vs. Luke Hawkz & the Naturals (Chase Stevens & Andy Douglas) Deluxe squashola. Hawkz, formerly of Wrestling Society X, has been used as a rent-a-jobber before. Former TNA stars Stevens & Douglas, are making their WWE-TV debuts. None, however, put up much of a fight vs. Show, who cleared out Douglas & Hawkz before finishing Stevens with a KO punch. Winner: Big Show. Before the match, the Floyd Mayweather video was replayed, and comments were solicited from Evander Holyfield and Roy Jones, Jr., plus more from Michael Buffer, who might just get called on to be the ring announcer at Mania. Also, there was a post-Raw interview that Mike Adamle conducted with Chris Jericho, who now is a believer in that Mayweather is in way over his head.
Match 3: Edge (w/Curt Hawkins & Zack Ryder) vs. Sho Funaki (non-title) Why the champ needs his brainwashed flunkies at his side for a non-threat like Funaki, I don't know. It leaves him with zero credibility as a champion in my book. Protracted squash #2. Typical Funaki JTTS match, too. Funaki gets tossed around, gets a rally or two in, then gets taken down. Funaki hit an enziguri, but after Edge sidestepped him on an Irish whip, the former cruiser champion and commentator was speared, then tombstoned. Yep, Edge decided to further diss Undertaker by cribbing the Deadman's finisher. Winner: Edge. Post-match, the Rated R Superstar cut a promo on Taker, promising that there was more to come later. Oddly enough, Undertaker faces Chavo Guerrero later.
Time now for Poser's Happy Hour, otherwise known as the VIP Lounge. Montel V. Porter's guest is Intercontinental champion Chris Jericho, who has recovered nicely after being KO'd by Big Show on Monday. Porter stalled by cutting a promo, claiming he's better than the other competitors in Money in the Bank, including Jericho. Nice way to let the fans know that you are SO not winning, Porter. Jericho's heard enough, and makes his way out. He proceeds to cut a classic Jericho promo, using the TitanTron to illustrate his point. MVP sounds good for a guy's initials, but what would it be like if Porter was named with initials that spelled "ZIT", "LOSER", or "JACKASS"? Porter, of course is not digging, but climbs the ladder to show how he could win. Jericho overturns the ladder, and Porter is hot shotted off the top rope.
Match 4: Kane vs. Chuck Palumbo Rematch from 2 weeks ago, when Kane squashed Palumbo like a grape. Not so this time, as the two are more evenly matched in the return bout. Late in the match, the two collide head-to-head in the center of the ring. Just before referee Charles Robinson can administer a 10 count, Great Khali comes out and attacks both men. Chop to the head for Kane. Khali bombs for both. Mark Henry comes out. World's Strongest Slam to Khali & Kane, with a pancake splash in the corner to Palumbo in between. Winner: None. Match ruled a no contest.
Match 5: John Morrison & Mike Mizanin vs. Jesse & Festus (WWE tag team titles) After losing a non-title match and a couple of 6-man tags in recent weeks to Jesse & Festus, including on ECW on Tuesday, Miz & Morrison had to at least take a step toward balancing the books. So far, this is the best match on the card, based on psychology alone. Festus & Morrison started, and the former ECW champion was getting mauled. Miz wasn't faring much better. After a tag to Jesse, things began to turn in favor of the champions. A springboard enziguri by Morrison put Jesse in major peril, and the champs isolated him for several minutes. He finally gets the hot tag to Festus, and the mauling starts anew. Festus hit a fallaway slam on Miz, then tagged Jesse back in. Assisted shoulder block gets only 2 before Morrison, who'd low-bridged Festus over the top, broke up the fall. Miz then hit the Reality Check to end it. Winners: John Morrison & Mike Mizanin. Michael Cole reports that MVP & Chris Jericho will battle next week. Raw Rebound is replayed. Classic Triple H scheme.
Match 6: Chavo Guerrero (w/Edge, Zack Ryder, & Curt Hawkins) vs. Undertaker (non-title) The arrogance of Edge knows no bounds. He promised he'd show everyone he'd taken things to a new level, so there's more to him and his thugs giving Chavo some backup. "Fiancee" Vicki Guerrero does have the night off, mentioned only in passing by Cole in the last segment. The only way Chavo actually gets any offense in is via distractions from Edge and his flunkies. Otherwise, this is protracted squash #3, but Undertaker would pay a heavy price. Undertaker hit the snake eyes in the corner and a boot to the face. He cleared out Hawkins & Edge from the apron, and caught Chavo trying to come off the top with a chokeslam. Ryder was bum-rushed over the top. The Deadman then applied the gogoplata, and Chavo, bleeding from the mouth, tapped quickly. Winner: Undertaker. Post-match, Edge and the Edgeheads attacked anew, and this time, the beatdown was on. Chavo, however, didn't take part, as he was gone. Repeated chair shots to the gut put Taker down, and Edge finished it with a con-chair-to while Hawkins & Ryder held the Deadman down. It won't be like that at Wrestlemania, as the cowardly champion has shot his last salvo of evil.
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