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| Match-by-match results
and television rating of this edition of WWE Monday Night Raw. |
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| Quick Results |
Shawn Michaels def. Randy Orton
Intercontinental Championship Match:
Umaga def. Jeff Hardy
Women's Championship Match:
Melina def. Mickie James
Money In The Bank Qualifying Match:
Ric Flair and Carlito goto no contest
John Cena def. Edge by dq |
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| Detailed Results |
One year ago this week, Shawn Michaels was preparing to face
Vince McMahon at Wrestlemania, and the insane chairman sent
his then-pregnant daughter Stephanie to spike HBK's water
before a match vs. Shane. Tonight, however, is a different
story........ We open with HBK and John Cena backstage. Cena
is offering to watch HBK's back vs. Randy Orton. HBK doesn't
want or need the champ's help. Unfortunately, for some unknown
reason, the last part of this segment was bumped for commercials,
an obvious mistake by USA tech nerds. Fortunately, this was
recapped later in the show.
We come back from our abrupt commercial break to see HBK making
his way down to the ring for tonight's opening bout......
Shawn Michaels vs. Randy Orton. Already,
Michaels is looking like a fool for not trusting Cena, since
Edge decided to accompany Orton, despite what happened last
week. The bout is fairly even until a late ref bump. Edge
takes HBK's tag belt and tries to slide it into the ring.
Ref Chad Patten intercepts, and Michaels schoolboys Orton
to gain the fall.
Winner: Shawn Michaels. Post-match, Orton clotheslines Michaels,
and after Edge slides a chair into the ring, hits the RKO
on the chair. That brings Cena out, and Rated RKO bails out,
with Cena keeping his eyes fixed on the former tag team champs.
Backstage, Vince is with Armando Estrada, who assures the
insane chairman that he has nothing to worry about as Umaga
defends the Intercontinental title vs. Jeff Hardy. Jon Coachman
steps in after Estrada leaves, and Vince tells him he thinks
his son Shane should be the guest ref for Umaga-Bobby Lashley
at Wrestlemania. Better start reading Hemingway, Vince. Meanwhile,
Todd Grisham interviews Carlito & Ric Flair, who will
face each other later to determine the final spot in Money
in the Bank III. Pretty standard stuff.
Umaga vs. Jeff Hard [Intercontinental Championship
Match] Hardy went right after the champion, hoping
to take him down hard and fast, but couldn't keep him off
his feet long enough to get the 3. Umaga put him down with
a hard clothesline, and from there it was deja vu for Hardy,
who was destroyed within minutes. Winner: Umaga.
Masterlock challenge: Chris Masters vs. Hacksaw Jim
Duggan. As soon as Duggan was announced, it was pretty
academic. Duggan tried, but failed. Winner: Chris Masters.
Chairman Wackjob makes his way out, prepared to announce the
Board of Directors' pick to officiate the Battle of the Billionaires.
Earlier, there was a bit where Erik Estrada, John Travolta,
and others predicted Donald Trump would lose. "Deal or
No Deal" host Howie Mandel was non-committal. Back live
in Phoenix, this week's worst kept secret is held back just
a wee bit longer as Eric Bischoff makes a surprise appearance.
Eric now lives in the Valley of the Sun, and got a babyface
pop, especially when he told Vince he believes the mad king
would lose. Eric leaves, and Mick Foley, pushing "The
Hardcore Diaries", is another surprise. Ok, I get it.
Mick is also back as a babyface after his heel run ended so
abruptly last summer. Mick's wearing his old ref's shirt,
but he's officiating some contest at a local restaurant between
ex-NBA star Charles Barkley and the Suns' mascot, the Gorilla,
who makes an appearance. Shane finally shows up, but he's
trying to get his dad to return to the back. Vince won't budge,
so Shane comes down to the ring. The Board voted 5-4 against
the McMahons. Shane whispers the name of the guest ref, but
the fans know who it is anyway, punctuated by the familiar
sound of breaking glass. Yep, Stone Cold Steve Austin will
don the stripes for the first time since Wrestlemania 20.
Austin says nary a word, and just starts with the beer party,
splashing some suds onto Vince, with Shane getting a few stray
drops.
Playboy cover babe Ashley Massaro is the guest ring announcer
for the next match. Melina vs. Mickie James [Women's
Championship, falls count anywhere match] For her
first title defense, Melina decided to take the match out
of the ring to start, and led Mickie on a merry chase all
the way to the divas' locker room. Next thing you know, Victoria
gets involved and grabs Mickie. Torrie Wilson chases her former
ally away with some hair spray. Candice Michelle comes out
of the shower, so Melina steals her towel, forcing the cameraman
into some difficult angles, and we lose visual contact, forcing
a commercial break. Back from break, and Mickie has chased
Melina back to the ring. Not much to do there. Mickie tries
a huracanrana, but can't connect, and falls on her head. Melina
comes down and hooks the leg for the quick pin. Once again,
it seemed too sudden, and they suggested that Mickie might've
been legitimately injured. Winner: Melina. Post-match, Melina
snatched the belt from Ashley and got up in the sk8ter girl's
grill. Ashley pushed Melina down, threw down her cap, and
left to attend to Mickie. Should it surprise anyone that Jerry
Lawler had a preview copy of Playboy?
Carlito (w/Torrie Wilson) vs. Ric Flair [Money In
The Bank Qualifying Match] Somehow, given the participants,
this got awfully sloppy. Carlito went to hit the springboard
elbow, but Flair was already on the way down before Carlito
connected. Worse, the Great Khali picked that time to appear
and attacked both men. His tree slam to Flair didn't look
right, either. Winner: None. Match ruled a No Contest.
One of the greatest AWA champions of all time, Nick Bockwinkel,
is the next inductee into the Hall of Fame. You know, of course,
that Bobby Heenan will be the one doing the inducting. That's
the lock of the week..
Backstage, Randy Orton tells Edge straight up that he isn't
going to be at ringside for the main event. If you're thinking
swerve, well, here's another surprise for ya.......
John Cena vs. Edge. Well, it's supposed to
be Edge, but he's chickened out, since Orton won't help him.
Instead, he recruits Team Poser (MNM) to come to the ring,
and selects Johnny Nitro to sub. Edge claims he's color blind
and a civil rights activist, but it's clear that he's thinking
this up as he goes along. This doesn't get very far. Nitro
gets an early advantage, but Cena rallies and is about to
FU Nitro when Joey Mercury hits the ring and chop blocks Cena.
It becomes 3-on-1 when HBK comes down. He hesitates at first
and starts back up the ramp, but then decides to come to his
partner's aid after all. Edge runs away, and Michaels chases
MNM off. He then leaves Cena behind after all, leaving the
champ to try to make sense of it all with less than a month
to go before Wrestlemania. Winner: John Cena via DQ.
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| Location:
Phoenix, Arizona |
| Commentary:
Jim Ross & Jerry Lawler |
| Report by:
2xzone.com Staff Member J.C. Gilbert |
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