Home / Results / Monday Night Raw / April 23, 2012

1. Chris Jericho def. Kofi Kingston-submission.

2. Lord Tensai def. R-Truth.

3. Big Show & Great Khali def. Cody Rhodes & Alberto Del Rio when Show pinned Rhodes.

4. Divas title: Nikki Bella def. Beth Phoenix to win the title.

5. Non-title: Mark Henry def. Sheamus due to a fast count by guest ref Daniel Bryan.

6. Non-title: Santino Marella & Zack Ryder def. Primo & Epico Colon when Marella pinned Primo.

7. Brodus Clay & Hornswoggle def. Jack Swagger & Dolph Ziggler-DQ due to interference from Vickie Guerrero.

We are supposed to open with a contract signing for Brock Lesnar vs. John Cena at Extreme Rules, with Teddy Long representing for John Laurinaitis. Cena is out, but Lesnar isn't. Laurinaitis comes out and uses Teddy as a relay, saying Lesnar will arrive later and sign the contract on his terms. Oh, that will come back and haunt Laurinaitis for sure. Before Cena can leave, Edge makes a special guest appearance to give him a pep talk, trying to shake off two big losses in the last three weeks. Will this have an effect on Cena? We'll know for sure later.

1. Chris Jericho vs. Kofi Kingston.

These two were last matched on March 30 on Smackdown. They got a little more time, and varied the offense on both sides. No one was going to be able to follow this one. Jericho tried to apply the Walls, but Kingston kicked free. Kofi went for a springboard move, but Jericho met him halfway with the Code Breaker, then applied the Walls. As he did last time, Jericho put more pressure by putting his knee against Kofi's head, forcing Kingston to tap. Winner: Chris Jericho.

Post-match, Jericho cut one last promo on CM Punk for Extreme Rules, and said he's giving Punk a present.

David Otunga is already in Chicago, but on a more personal matter involving fiancee Jennifer Hudson, so to cover the prospect of any extended absence post-PPV, Eve Torres is installed as an "executive administrator" under Laurinaitis. Lovely.

CM Punk reveals the present. A gift basket full of booze, which he gives to Josh Mathews, save for one bottle of Jack Daniels...

2. Lord Tensai (w/Sakamoto) vs. R-Truth.

Squash. Tensai no-sold Truth's offense, then killed him. Buttefly delayed suplex. Senton. Derailer. Truth got up, so Tensai went to the mist-augumented claw for the finish. Figured he would, eventually. Winner: Lord Tensai.

Kane promo. He claims Randy Orton is scared, and he's the boogeyman under the bed. Well, they couldn't be bothered to bring the Boogeyman back, could they? Orton appears on the TitanTron, and, in a case of payback, has ambushed Paul Bearer. Well, if it worked for Edge a ways back, why not for Orton, too? Kane claims his real father has been the devil all along. Oh, really?

Yo, creative. 2010 called. Get real.

3. Big Show & Great Khali vs. Cody Rhodes & Alberto Del Rio (w/Ricardo Rodriguez).

Khali was selling the leg injury from Smackdown. The heels got heat on Show's knee, and, as was the case Friday, Rhodes applied the figure 4, but couldn't get a submission. However, when Show finally got back up, Del Rio suddenly decided to leave, and Rhodes was left high & dry. One chokeslam later, and it was over. Winners: Big Show & Great Khali.

Alex Riley tells Jericho he saw Punk drinking. They go to Punk's dressing room, and it certainly looks like he's imbibing. But you know what they say. Looks can be deceiving.......

4. Divas title: Beth Phoenix vs. Nikki Bella (w/Brie).

Eve came out and said this was now a lumberjill match. I guess this makes up for the lack of diva use the last couple of weeks. Strangely, when Nikki was tossed, none of the lumberjills came over until Beth went out to the floor herself. Phoenix barely hit the floor before her ankle gave out. Dogpile on both combatants. Nikki gets tossed in first, followed by Beth. The ref checks on Beth, who says she can continue, but before she can turn around, Nikki schoolgirls her and we have a new champion! Winner: Nikki Bella.

If this is an injury angle, and Beth has to be off for a period of time, this opens the door for Kharma to return. Remember what she said last year to the Bellas?

Teddy Long is forced to represent for Laurinaitis again, this time to supervise a field sobriety test for CM Punk. Jericho talked Laurinaitis into this, with the provision that if Punk failed, he'd be stripped of the title. Jericho wants to win it that way, eh? Oh, what a fool! Of course, Punk "failed", but it's all an act. As soon as the police leave, and Punk hands the title to Long, he gets one more chance. Suddenly lucid, the champion turns the tables on Jericho, chasing the sanctimonius, scandal-mongering challenger out of the ring and the arena. Long follows Punk up the ramp to return the belt as Eve & Laurinaitis look on backstage with disapproval. Foiled again!

Brock Lesnar has finally arrived, and is unwilling to answer questions from Josh, who gets summarily pummeled. Even Michael Cole is outraged........

5. Non-title: Sheamus vs. Mark Henry.

Daniel Bryan has been assigned as guest ref. You can guess where this is going. Bryan taunts Sheamus, who is under probation. Henry hits a clothesline, and Bryan makes an illegal fast count. Winner: Mark Henry.

Post-match, Bryan removes the ref's shirt, and that allows Sheamus some retribution. He beats up Bryan on the floor and throws him back in the ring. Henry eats a Brogue Kick, but Bryan gets the last word with the Yeslock. Henry & Sheamus will be rematched on Friday, and hopefully, there won't be another screwjob........

6. Non-title: Primo & Epico Colon (w/Rosa Mendes) vs. Santino Marella & Zack Ryder.

Last week, the champs lost to Big Show & Great Khali. Now, it's the current and former US champs. Marella gets The Miz in the pre-show on Sunday, but a win here, and he & Ryder could have a bigger payday awaiting. For the 2nd straight week, the champs were all but squashed. At least this time, they had guys selling for them. Epico tried to run interference for his cousin to avoid the cobra, but Ryder flipped him over the top. Primo with a dropkick, but Marella rolls through and the cobra strikes Primo. Winners: Santino Marella & Zack Ryder.

Post-match, Abraham Washington meets the champs & Rosa backstage, offering his services........

7. Brodus Clay & Hornswoggle (w/Naomi & Cameron) vs. Jack Swagger & Dolph Ziggler (w/Vickie Guerrero).

This match is sponsored by Taco Bell, which is something new. Not much to this one. 'Swoggle & Ziggler started and traded kicks. Headscissor takedown enables 'Swoggle to tag out. Swagger got T-boned halfway to Chicago. Clay went for the splash, but Vickie got in the ring and slapped him for the cheap DQ. 2nd straight week Team Guerrero has avoided jobbing. Winners: Brodus Clay & Hornswoggle.

After, Vickie tried to make it up by giving Clay his hat and tried to show she could dance, but Hornswoggle bit her on the butt, chasing her and her thunder thighs out of the ring......

Kane locates Paul Bearer in the refrigeration unit, then sends him back. So much for that reunion........

Now, it's time for the contract signing. Lesnar is out first this time, but when Cena stalls, Lesnar turns diva and makes some demands, including putting his name on the title. Cena finally comes out before Dr. Laurinaitis can have his Frankenstein monster turn on him, carrying with him a padlock chain. Lesnar cuts a promo, prompting Cena to sign, but though a fight is teased, Lesnar leaves, with Cena staring a hole at him as we fade to black.......